As with most of my blog posts for the last two years, I must start off by saying that I blog so infrequently now that I don't know what you know. This leaves me unaware of where to begin, or just how much to cover.
I guess a good place to start would be the title, Passing on the Torch. My Great Grandma Esther recently passed away. She was my last Grandma, I have one Grandpa left and he is a shadow of his former self. I had lots and lots of Grandparents all the way up until I was about 12. People in my family all seem to have kids fairly young, so when I was born my Grandma was only 37 and my Great Grandma was only 54 or 55. Now they are both gone.
I was much more prepared for my Grandma Esther's death than I had been for my Grandma's death two years go. My Grandma passed away far too young and I was much closer to her, she was as integral to my life as my mom is. My Grandma Esther though, she was ready to go. So much so that she actually started calling people to tell them goodbye a couple weeks before she passed.
It was kind of a horrifying concept at first, but the thing I came to realize is that there is a difference between giving up and being ready. I don't feel like she gave up on life, she just felt it was her time to go.
A sad story, but one I find a lot of humor in is, one day she was convinced it was her last. She insisted it was her last in fact, despite everyone disagreeing with her. The next morning when my Aunt went to check on her she was utterly pissed that she has woken up. This underlines just how feisty the women in my family are, even when they are ready to die. I love you Grandma Esther, we miss you.
I guess that doesn't exactly explain why I chose "Passing on the Torch" as the title of my blog. Though I am sure you see the connection. Since I was more prepared emotionally for my Grandma Esther's passing, this event made me think a lot more about my family as a whole, the older generation that looked after us when we were kids, that warm blanket of love that we thrived upon and grew accustomed to. Its gone, and while I miss them all very much, it strikes me as being very scary. Now its time for my mom's generation to pick up the torch and lead us, or even my own generation. We're becoming the elders, the leaders.
I just hope to do for my kids what my family has done for me, or better.
Alright, one topic down, what else should I talk about?
Well, I think its common knowledge now, but I should write a blog about the fact that I asked Samantha to be my wife! We are coming up on the second anniversary of when we started dating and its been a little over two months since I popped the question.
We moved into a house in December, its been great so far, we bought an electric lawnmower (cordless of course)! Its been hard mowing the lawn though because of my shoulder.
Which is another topic I should talk about. I have to have surgery on my shoulder because of an injury I got... falling down a flight of stairs... two years ago...
I slipped on my carpeted stairs a couple years back and slid down on my butt, I got about halfway down before I caught myself with my right arm. It felt fine at the time, believe me it was my ass that hurt, but within a couple of weeks my right shoulder started hurting as well. And yes I am right handed.
My doctor recommended physical therapy, but I didn't follow up on that. I had never done physical therapy before and I'm not always into doing 'new' things, especially when it costs money. After 3-4 weeks my shoulder stopped hurting and I stopped thinking about it.
The following summer I couldn't throw a baseball or football, I would get a sharp pain in my shoulder any time I tried. It didn't keep hurting so I stopped thinking about it.
Well, this summer rolls around, sports are becoming even more competitive for my kids and I really was excited to get outside and start practicing with them. Well, Jadon was in baseball practice so Tristan and I were throwing the baseball around. My first throw to him I overshot him big time, he ran and got the ball and threw it back to me. My second throw made him look right into the sun, but I got it right to him... right in his face unfortunately! I felt so awful!
Fortunately he's a tough cookie, so he got back up, wiped the blood and tears off and we kept playing! About 30 minutes in I went to throw a ball, and I was throwing kind of soft since I had already hit him in the face once. Well, right as I let go of the ball I felt an awful pain in my shoulder, so bad that I almost fell over. I could barely hold my own arm up, and if I tried to hold anything at all, even a baseball mitt, it doubled the pain, which was already really bad.
So I went to the doctor and they tried a few things and made a few assessments and told me to do a few things. After an X-Ray an MRI and a couple weeks of physical therapy they decided surgery might be the option. I think its fairly certain that is what is going to happen, I'll find out more on Thursday when I get to talk to the surgeon myself. I'm a little worried about it, I've already had one nightmare about waking up after surgery with no arm. The most extensive surgery I've ever had is removing my Tonsils, or maybe my Wisdom teeth, not sure which is worse, they gassed me for both.
I'm getting really antsy to move, the only reason I still live here is because I have a great job and I just can't walk away from it. Maybe if I didn't have kids, but I can't be adventurous at their cost. Right now I'm foreseeing a move either next summer or the summer after. I can't wait to get back to the Seattle area, hoping to live in the Lynnwood/Everett/Mill Creek/Bothell area somewhere.
It would be nice if my company had some job openings over there that I was qualified for, I'll have to keep working on school and keep my eyes open.
I've always wondered why I stopped blogging so suddenly, a lot changed in a short amount of time and suddenly I just didn't do it anymore. If I had kept up my pace in 2009, it would have been my biggest year yet. My Grandma passing away had a huge impact on my life, but I don't think that is the reason. I think I blogged as a way of communicating with a specific friend of mine. The paths of our lives came closer together then ever before only to fork and go in vastly different directions, away from one another. I can't say that is the only reason, though it is certainly one of them.
Blogging is good for the soul though, and I am hoping to start doing it more regularly, even if only once a month. That would be an improvement! I think this is good for now, feels good to talk to myself about all of this stuff ;-P