Monday, September 27, 2010

Good Weekend!

Go Cougs! Despite a few bumps in the road, I think they are clearly doing better on the field than they did last year. Tuel especially is showing signs of improvement, his ability to throw under massive pressure have increased. He made several plays that last year would have just been sacks.

The tickets we got were just plain amazing. My mom snagged them for us from someone at WSU that wasn't able to make the game. I guess the seats we had require a $550 donation just to be able to buy the ticket, so holy crap, thank you very much for someone's generosity!

The Seahawks game was awesome! I didn't get to watch it all, but the parts I saw (the 2nd quarter and the last 5 min of the game) were non-stop edge of my seat action!

School started again for me last week, thats going well. Its just a little accounting class, just taking one class after the time off I just took. Next quarter I will take two classes again.

The boys are doing great! 3rd and 2nd grade this year! Jadon's 9th birthday is coming up fast, we are planning a trip to some place in spokane to play some mini-golf and then the next weekend we are planning a trip to Bellingham to visit their cousins. Secret News! Nicole, the boy's mom, is coming for a secret visit the weekend we are playing Mini-Golf. When she said she wanted to come up we concocted this plan to keep it from the boys and convince them that we are going to the airport to pick up Samantha's cousin Brandon (who is fictional!) They are going to be soooo suprised!

I've completed one whole week of my new diet! One of the most important things to know about my old diet is, when I would eat a meal, whether it was at home or in a restaurant, I would sometimes get extremely tired due tot he food, so tired that I wouldn't have been able to drive until it wore off. It generally would only take 10-15 min. to wear off, but still, totally weird. It made me think I might have been diabetic or something at one point, but that wasn't the case. So anyway, this whole last week I haven't run into this issue even once!

I feel good, and in another week I think I'll feel better.

Jason out

Monday, September 20, 2010

A New Way

I am starting my new diet tomorrow, maybe a new life all together. I'll be eating a lot differently, and hopefully feeling healthier and losing weight. It all starts tomorrow...

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Picking up where I left off

As the title says, its time for me to pick up where I left off. I haven't been blogging much for well over a year now and I really miss it. Im going to be trying some new things out in my life, some lifestyle changes, and I think Im really going to need this tool again.

Right now I am working on moving my MySpace blog over to this blog, I want to get the bulk of it over here and then I will go back through and edit it. There are several posts not meant for the general public that will probably be temporarily made public due to this move. Feel free to read it while you get the chance ;)

Most of it is public though, so plenty of good reading. Lots of stuff in there about how I emotionally survived my divorce and custody battle.

Just a quick update, wishing everyone the best!

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Una entrevista con el culo loco muchacho blanco, Jason Bishop

Time for an update, a few things have happened that I wanted to share.

Its been a very long time since I last blogged, I still get the urge to blog on a regular basis, but even though my girlfriend would disagree, I spend far less time on my computer than I did 'pre-girlfriend' :-)

Oh and if you don't speak Spanish (which I don't) and don't want to translate it yourself, the title of this blog according to the Google Translator is "An interview with the crazy ass white boy, Jason Bishop"

I think its safe to say that I don't really blog anymore at this point. Im going to try to keep it alive here and there just like this, but I feel that 'blogging' denotes that I am doing this on a regular basis in some way, which I am clearly not.

There is really a lot to say since my last real blog, which I don't even know anything about, Im not going to go and check. I hope I can remember it all.

Im going to start out with my son Tristan:

Tristan turned 7 in March of this year, he is getting quite tall and currently sporting a short Mohawk that he likes us to spike with my hair creme stuff. Tristan has just completed the first grade, he was actually sad to have school end recently because he said "I love to learn." I proceeded to comfort him by telling him that he can continue learning by picking out interesting books at the library.

Tristan did very well all throughout his first grade year. He remained at the top of his class in reading and has only gotten more and more excited about reading and math. Recently, over the past year or so, he has started to develop a sense of humor, similar in some ways to my own (big surprise). When he says something funny with his new found humor, it really takes us all by surprise because its all in how he says it.

This won't be as funny out of context, but here is a very good example that had me cracking up. Tristan and I were talking and I was about to go outside, I reached out for the door knob and Tristan said very sharply and seriously, "don't touch that", he interrupted out conversation to say this and I took it very seriously, and when I looked down and then up at him in confusion the look he gave me made me realize he was playing tricks. I cracked up big time and he was pretty proud of himself. There have now been many more moments like that.

Ok, I was just going to use the one example above, but I thought of another good one. My girlfriend Samantha sometimes drops the kids off at school in the morning for me, and when she does she says to the boys "don't be kissing any girls today" and they do their little embarrassed dance and then head into school. Well, one day Samantha was tired and forgot to say this, she was a little distracted. As Tristan got out of the car he turned to her and said "don't be kissing any boys today."

So thats whats been going on with Tristan, now to Jadon:

Jadon is over 8 1/2 years old now and enjoying every minute of it. Both Jadon and Tristan did great in school (though Jadon does still have many problems paying attention to his teachers) and I am proud of both of them. I just deleted most of this paragraph because Im not quite sure how to say this. School is coming really easily to Tristan, he got consistent high marks all year long in everything. Jadon, on the other hand, has not. Jadon has truly struggled with reading over the last two years.

During Jadon's first grade year, I realized we weren't reading enough at home and changed the time we read so that we would read right away when we all got home at 5:15pm. This vastly improved how consistently we were reading and it became much more regular. This helped Jadon a little bit, but between 1st and 2nd Grade his reading level took a huge drop, he didn't read very much over that summer and when he came back he was barely reading at a Kindergarten Level.

At some point Jadon and Tristan and I made a deal that when they got their reading to a certain level, and had completed the 1st Grade and then proceeded to pass a test of my own devising that they would earn a Nintendo DSi for themselves. This helped motivate Jadon early in the year and he always kept it in mind. But what motivated him the most was when he actually started making real progress with his reading. He started getting so excited because he could see and feel that he was doing better and better each and every week. Every time I met with his teacher she always had great news about how much he was improving.

I am happy to announce that at the end of the school year, Jadon was reading at or above the target reading level. He earned his DS a couple of months ago, I didn't make the final test too difficult, more a display of progress than anything. I picked 30 pages of a chapter book and I had him re-read and study those pages and ask me any questions he had about how to pronounce words properly. I then had him read those pages to me out loud and then answer a few very simple questions about the story and characters.

Jadon's journey feels inspiring to me because in many ways, once it got started it was self driven. He got so excited about his own progress that there was no stopping him. His report card shows it, low marks in many things at the beginning of the year and average to high marks at the end.

Jadon's teeth are very crooked, just like his Mom's teeth and several people in her family. Based on the dentist's recommendation, we decided to see an Orthodontist about getting them repaired. About a year ago Jadon had his two lower canines extracted early (the baby versions) to make room for his new adult teeth. His teeth are crooked because they are all in there tight together and there isn't any space, so when his new adult ones come in they have been coming in behind or in the front of his baby teeth. So they are removing his Canines that don't normally fall out until around 10-12 years old to make space. His new adult teeth are naturally moving into place.

Jadon just had his two upper Canines removed this last week. Took three people to hold him down, including myself, while the doctor put the shots in his mouth to numb him. I just about broke out into tears with the way he was screaming and crying in there. Its scary and I don't think his mother could have even been in the same building, let alone the same room.

Normally we have an Orthodontist appointment every 6 months, but he wanted to see us sooner this time, in about 3 months Jadon is going to get evaluated for Braces, they will just be on his 8 adult teeth and it will help to continue correcting their angles.

One last piece of news about Jadon, and this will lead directly into my news about their summer. Nicole has agreed to let me adopt Jadon!

I've reported on improvements in my friendship with Nicole at times, but I would say in the last 6 or 7 months things have really evened out and we could honestly say we are friends again. She came up to visit and got to meet my girlfriend and they both really seemed to get along and like each other. Nicole even tells me to say hi to Samantha when I speak to her on the phone. Im glad they like each other, it makes things so much easier :-).

In addition to this, Nicole and her boyfriend are breaking up. Its not my story to tell so I won't get into it, but I mention it because it does impact my life and the boys lives. Because of the breakup, Nicole also has to find a new place to live. With all the turmoil in her life right now and not having a good secure place to bring the boys down to, she has made a very difficult decision and decided they should stay with me for the summer and she will come up for a whole week sometime to spend with the boys.

I agreed to this and part of me is really excited. But there is this strange new part of me that I wanted to talk about. I hate the summers in many ways, I miss the boys a lot during the summer time. But as much as I hate to say it, it has gotten easier and easier like people said it would. As much as I miss them, part of me looks forward to the time alone. I was looking forward to having a summer with just Samantha and I, but I am super excited the boys get to stay and they will be here for my 30th birthday!

I think that is all the news about my boys for now. Its weird having to think back and remember all of this stuff, it was nicer when I blogged as it happened :-P

Samantha and I are doing well, great actually. We have some problems here and there like everyone but we are developing the tools to properly deal with these issues. I won't talk about our problems here except to mention, it turns out Im kind of a prude and she is.. well, the opposite of that.

Samantha just got a job at SEL where I have been working for more than three years. And we live together now :-) We went through a rough spot several months ago, but I felt that through our communication we were able to start addressing those issues and our relationship got back on track and now we live together. Its fun to say, why don't you say it with me :-P

We passed the year mark for my Grandma's death in May. Its been a rough year without her, and it was nice to get back together with family and remember her together. I miss my grandma and I know she would love Samantha.

Work has been going ok, Im not the biggest fan of our current supervisor though and that is causing me to stir the pot a bit, but I assure you, its for the best. :-)

School is going kind of slow at the moment, with all the stress from earlier in the year Im taking the summer off, and then getting back into it in the fall with an Accounting class.

And last I want to say Congratulations to my friend Sarah. She just got engaged to her boyfriend. I don't know if she reads my blog anymore, but I hope she knows that I am happy for her. Our friendship had its ups and downs, usually an Up immediately followed by a down actually, she had a major impact on my life and I will always remember her support during my divorce and custody battle. A year ago our lives went in separate but not unexpected directions. I miss my friend Sarah.

Thanks for reading my blog everyone


Sunday, March 14, 2010

Exercise Log 007

..Uhhhhggg, its been difficult keeping on track with this, no real progress yet. My body is starting to get used to the exercise again, so I think I'll be able to increase the amount of time I spend exercising.

Im going to work on making this a daily thing, thats the most difficult part of all of this.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Exercise Log 002

Second log entry! Its already working I can feel it working! or not, but I know it will have a good effect. 2 days isnt enough for anything.

I only went for 20 min again, I still think that is a good place to start. I just need to start thinking about when to bring it up to 30 min.

I didnt go with the morning workout today, I stayed up pretty late last night. I probably won't have much to report for the first two weeks, though I still will be posting any progress on log entry 5, whether there is any or not.

Ill keep most of these short, feeling good about this so far, cant wait to look back on this in a week then Im dragging telling myself I feel like all the bones in my body are broken. Got to hit the 2 week mark fast!

Monday, March 1, 2010

Exercise Log 001

I recently bought myself a new toy, a Nautilus E514 Elliptical.

Check out my baby!

I just finished my first workout with her. Wanted to start out kind of slow, build a good foundation. Thats mostly how I live my life in general since the divorce, and it works.

Here is how I want this to work. Im not going to share my weight, just a goal of how much weight I want to lose within a certain time frame. I haven't decided the time frame yet though, so I haven't decided on my exact goal.

Essentially I want to drop 110 lbs. Hopefully within the next 18-24 months. Then I will be hovering right around the weight that I want to be at. But for an actual goal I think I want it to be short term, like 4 months or 3 months.

As always, my blogs develop as I write them, so ignore the sentence above that says "so I haven't decided on my exact goal." Since I want to lose 110 overall, I will say that I want to lose that in 16 months. I will divide this up into groups of 4 month long goals. To make things easy Im going to increase my goal to lose 112 pounds so that it is a number divisible by 4. So the goal is to lose a minimum of 28 lbs every 4 months. The benefit of this is it will also put me beyond the rule where you shouldn't lose more than 100 lbs in a year, which may or may not be true, sounds like common sense, but I don't plan on doing any research.

So that I don't go too crazy Im going to check my weight loss every 5th work out. That is far more often than I should though.

Here is the plan, I want to start working out for an hour per day, divided up between two 30 min. periods, once in the morning and once in the evening.

Each work out I want to do a quick blog, probably quicker than this one, unless I think of something to say .

So just so were clear, that means Im going to check my weight approximately every 2.5 days.

Anyway, today was the first. I exercised for 20 min. Planning on getting up tomorrow morning for a followup session.


Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Personal Notes and Musings

Ive tried to make my life better, my children's lives better. In many ways I've succeeded. At times I've felt that I've pushed forward too hard though. Sometimes taking too much for myself, and sometimes not enough.

Women have been the source of my strength and my weakness in equal measure throughout my whole life. Sometimes I ask too much of them, and sometimes not enough.

I have been told to downplay it, I have been told to make it not that big of a deal. And I hope it isn't. You don't know what Im talking about I know, but I am coming upon a moment in my life that I have long feared. It comes too soon, yet not soon enough. Within the month of March I will be telling Jadon that while I love him very much, while I am raising him and he is my own son, I am his father in every way... but one... Biologically. Just thinking about how to say it to him is the most heart wrenching experience, I can't put into words that which is a reality. But it doesn't matter.

I have gotten a lot of great advice, I put out a request for advice in a few places and several people came to my rescue. Most of these people are kids who were adopted by their parents, sharing their experiences with me from when they were first told, how they reacted, how their parents handled it. Lots of really good advice and it has really bolstered my confidence. Nicole and I will be telling Jadon and Tristan at the same time, we're going to be prepared to answer their questions, but we aren't going to make too big of a deal out of it.

One of the insights I got from someone I work with indicated it was much much harder on her father than it was on her. I think I know exactly what she means, I imagine the worst but I know Jadon is strong and can handle the information, especially how we will present it. But inside me nothing changes, even though I know he wont, I'm afraid he will feel differently about me, see me differently. Even though it will probably just be rebellious teenage hormones talking, my heart will break a little if I ever heard him use it against me "you're not my real dad, I dont have to listen to you".

My first valentines day with Samantha was very nice, I wanted to make it special. It seems weird to me though, Valentines day came the week after we decided to step back a little from our relationship. I bought a bottle of wine, a rose in a neat little heart shaped vase, with a gem embedded in the center of the rose pedals, and a big box of chocolates. This is what she found when she woke up in the morning. Then I took her, her sister and my kids out to a big dinner at Red Lobster. We all dressed up nice, the boys and I were wearing nice clothes and Ties. During dinner I gave her a nice diamond/gold necklace that I knew she liked.

It was a nice day, Jadon went crazy for the crab, I thougth he might not like the work involved in cracking it open, but he freaking loved it, he was so proud of himself whenever he got a piece out, he got really excited and overall it was a really good experience for him.

Basketball is going really well so far this year. Jadon's team lost the first two games, and they have won the last two games. As soon as basketball is over, the boys want to start Soccer, and then Baseball when that is over. They are becoming more and more interested in the sports, even requesting practice time outside of their normal practices. Its cool, AND they pay video games more, the best of both worlds!

I bought an elliptical to help me get back into shape finally. I posted a link to the model I bought on facebook. I really like it so far, I was hoping to start daily exercising tomorrow morning, but as its almost 2am, I think I might wait one more day. There were just things I needed to finally get into my blog.

It cost more than I had originally planned on spending, but I looked into some user reviews and I gave it some thought. I think this one will be a good fit for me and hopefully last me at least 2 years of heavy use. Pun/Fat joke fully intended. Heavy Use, haha. F-Word!


Monday, February 1, 2010

The Adventure Continues

What the hell!?! I was sure I did a blog in January at some point. I guess not :-(. Normally I do a blog when the boys leave for a trip (which I did) then I do a blog when they get back. Well, NORMALLY I did several blogs per month, but I havent been on that schedule for awhile.

Before I get too deep into this blog I want to put out there a little info about something I have wanted to do for quite some time. Ive mentioned on several occasions that I want to maybe try to get my Blog published as kind of a memoir geared towards people who identify with the divorce/custody battle struggles I went through, primarily the emotional struggles. I feel my state of mind and the issues I was dealing with are genuinely reflected within the words of my blog.

As I said above, Ive mentioned this on several occasions. Well guess what? mentioning something in my blog doth not make it a reality. So I've taken one simple careful step forward towards reazlizing this, Ive put my feelers out on a few professionals that can hopefully give me some guidance on what to do with what I've got. Im not going to bother asking anyone if they think its a good idea, as I think it is and that is enough for me.

It will need a lot of editing before its complete, but that is not the kind of help I am looking for. At the moment I am looking for advice on exactly how to lay it out, if I should make it a word for word memoir, or if I should go in and write a bit of a cohesive narrative with lots of quotes from my blogs. LOTS of quotes from my blog though, I am still picturing that 2nd possiblity being like 75-80% blog.

There are really a lot of things I could do, which is why I am looking for a little advice and guidance. I am starting with some editors as they dont just sit there and check your english after all.

Im serious about this and I will feel it is a success if only 1 person were to identify with me and my experiences and hopefully feel comfort in knowing they are not alone, or possibly even learn some of the things I have learned. This is not an attempt to teach, but merely a humble attempt to share the experiences that reforged the very man typing out the words you are reading at this very moment. Ok, maybe not so humble! LOL

I am so grateful for the life I have and it just keeps getting better and better. I have an apartment that I mostly like. It could be bigger and cheaper, but I think I would feel that about any place I live! I like my kid's school and their teachers. I have a good job that is paying for me to go to school. I have family and some friends that love me (not that I have friends that dont love me, Im just saying that I dont have all that many friends, but I plan on changing that this year). I have a wonderful girlfriend that... tries.... to put up with all my shit :-). And saving the best for last, I have two of the worlds most wonderful kids in the world.

School is fucking tough! Its not really, its my stupid bullshit inability to manage any kind of working personal schedule that is killing me. I dont fucking do my homework on time and Im really getting frustrated with myself. Im taking some fairly simple classes and making them as hard as possible. Who does that?

Using my best Arnold Schwarzenegger impression "I am the Procrastinator".

And its true, I am. I think Ive started working towards fixing it, but the hardest thing on the planet (for me) is forming new habits.

I will succeed at this, nothing will stop me, nothing short of death can. Its too important to me and I need to get that through my thick skull! I can change and the way I handle the boys reading schedule proves it.

I used to think it was best to have them read before bedtime, which is a good time for normal leisure reading. But in order to guarantee that they got their reading practice in, we started reading as soon as we got home. Just today they were both reading some sick words to me and I couldn't be a prouder daddy. Tristan has a natural affinity for it, but Jadon has really struggled. I hate hate to play favorites, but a little part of me feels even more proud of Jadon just because I know how much work he has put into his reading and I can see just how far he has come, fighting every step of the way. I am proud to death of both my boys. If I come away from this parenting thing with anything, I hope it is knowing that my children will grow up knowing how to tackle challenges and how to learn from them and make themselves better.

Tristan's basketball ended before they left for winter break, he had some fun, though one game he did get hit in the face with the ball and get a bloody nose right away. The boys have both started being able to take a hit a little more gracefully, with or without tears they don't freak out anymore unless its really bad.

Jadon just started basketball and it is off the hook. Its so different from the younger age groups. He practices twice a week and then has a game on Sunday. The games last 40 minutes and are divided up into 10 minute quarters. I think the teams get time outs too, but for the most part the clock never stops running except in between quarters.

They use the big scoreboard up on the wall to keep track of the time and the score and stuff, they have 3 refs dressed appropriately and they are requiring the kids to follow even more of the rules. The boys are learning even more about 'How' the game is played and even starting to learn a little strategy.

Jadon's team voted on their team name and ended up with Killer Doughnuts. They played against The Terminators this last weekend in their first game and they lost 12-10. But they probably learned a lot more in that game than in any game or practice from previous years.

I am taking the boys and Samantha to a Cougar Basketball game this coming weekend. The team is pretty young this year, I wasnt expecting much out of them, and they have exceeded my expectations. Unfortunately that means I have been disappointed with them more than I expected, sometimes they do so well that when they do bad it sucks and looks really bad. But they are a young team, with some really nice talent, experience goes a long way.

The year already seems to be filling up like crazy. Basketball and cub scouts keeps me pretty busy through the beginning of the year, then in March Nicole, her mother, her sister and our nephews are coming to visit the boys. She will be here for 4 or 5 days I think.

Tristan's 7th birthday is in march. Can you believe that? My YOUNGEST is going to be 7. Wow. of course Im going to be 30 this year, so anything is imaginable.

We might have his party while his mom is here, its a couple weeks early, but one of the weekends in march after that we are going to try to go down to southern idaho with the boys so that they can meet Samantha's family. Im excited, Samantha's youngest brother is Tristan's age.

The first weekend of April the boys and I are traveling across the state with Samantha and possibly her sister Misty. I took April 1st and 2nd off, we are going to spend a day or two in seattle and 2 or 3 days in Bellingham. We are going to see some cousins and spend several hours at Gameworks in Seattle for Tristan's birthday. I think we will just walk around downtown on that Thursday though, last time we were there I think we rushed ourselves a bit.

Im excited, I love the west side and I cant wait to move back over there when the time is right.

Sometime during the later part of the school year the boys will start Rookie League baseball again, one more thing to keep us all busy busy.

Then ofcourse Im still planning on going to San Diego to celebrate my 30th Birthday, so watch out cause here I come all! The Wild Animal Park. The San Diego Zoo. Seaworld. Lego Land. plus a million different museums I want to check out. Its going to be a blast.

I spoke to Nicole a little bit last night, I probably haven't talked about her very much for awhile. As an update, things can still be a little tense especially when I think about all of the things I have yet to accomplish that I still wish to, like adopting Jadon, having him take on my name, and so on.

We get along alright at times, but then other times we can still be at each others throats in a heartbeat.

Thats why my conversation last night came as a surprise. She told me that even though we still have our differences, she knows how much I love the boys, she knows how much I do for them. She said she appreciates everything I do for them, and she wanted me to know she thinks I am doing a good job with them and that they are lucky to have me. It felt really good to hear, coming from her. I dont seek her approval, far from it, but hearing her acknowledge my hard work and my love for the boys was a great step forward. Even though she had to get off the phone abruptly because her boyfriend entered the room lol.

You know? I think I've said enough for now. Peace out all, have fun watching the Superbowl. We'll be at my moms house watching it this weekend! GO SAINTS!