Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Illusions and Reality

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I am told I set my Moral Standard too high, and that I enforce it too strictly. I am not the best man, I am bad with money and I certainly am not a motivated person in general, but I am a man none the less. My children will be men someday, and even if they take on some of my vices, I truly hope that they can learn to be as honorable as I. Perhaps more so, if they can learn to manage their money and meet related obligations.

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Another issue that arises within me becomes a problem. I still feel married. Technically, I am in fact married, but that is not the reality of the situation. When I say, though, that I still 'feel' married, it stems not from the technical side of the equation, but the emotional. I am by no means 'over' my wife, and I am still very fond of the thought that Jadon and Tristan deserve their Mommy and Daddy to give each other one last chance. That will never happen now, despite the emotion involved, I am far to rational a man to allow that kind of pain back into my life.

I dont know, I dont know what I am saying right now, nor do I know what I am thinking. My fingers lead the way, and the keyboard complies. I had intended to just mention that I finally got to see the movie "The Illusionist", and that it was much better than I had anticipated. Not to say I was not expecting a lot out of it, I was. I was very sure that I would love the movie. It exceeded my expectations.

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