Wednesday, November 15, 2006

A Crush on someone I work with

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[<-------EDIT------->] Recently I started feeling like I was ready to start dating again. Not fully ready, but to a point that I felt I couldnt move beyond unless I actually stepped foreward on my own.

I guess thats when things went downhill. With the loss of my Marriage, I had lost more than I thought. My Confidence. [<-------EDIT------->] I feel like Ive suddenly been thrust back into my awkward High School self.

At first I started thinking that perhaps Im not as ready as I thought. I am though, I am defeating myself at this. So many factors that I hadn't worried about previously came to mind.

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I want to take things slow and keep them fun and casual. Im not going to resist things moving foreward in a relationship, but I am definatly going to tread carefully. Also, I am not trying to find a step mother for my children. In time, my next serious relationship, I do intend to have more children, and I would expect whomever I am with to treat my children fairly, and love them. But for now, I wouldnt even intend on including my children in any relationships I may have. I dont want them to grow attached and be hurt, and I wouldn't want the person I am dating to feel intimidated or get the wrong idea about my intentions.

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Well, I best get back to bed I suppose. I fell asleep watching the Da Vinci Code last night, early. Not sure why, what I saw was interesting enough. The book itself is amazing. I guess I was just really tired. I woke up at 3am and decided to watch the other movie I had rented "An American Haunting".

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It took me the entire span of the 90 minute movie to write this blog (actually longer, the movie is over and I am clearly still writing). [<-------EDIT------->]

Good Night and Good Luck America.

-Jason

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